Posts

Oxalis, Mom and other Heart-Break

Image
This plant is a Triangularis Oxalis, also called purple shamrock, and is supposed to be lucky.  When she is happy and well cared for, she pops the most beautiful and tiny white flowers, which grow intermittently around the triangular shapes. She was given to my Mom by my cousin as a thank you for looking in on her son while she was visiting and caring for her father, my mother's brother, during his third and final cancer battle.  My mom was very close with her brother, always had been, but particularly during these last several years as they both battled cancer.  During my uncle's second battle, he had been visiting when he was diagnosed and ended up staying with my mother throughout the second battle.  They, then, ultimately and unfortunately, were brought even closer when my mother was diagnosed with cancer.  The first time.  When you battle cancer, you should never have to do it more than once, in my humble opinion.  Ever.  But, it happens. All...

It Doesn't Look Good For Us, My Friend

Image
When's It Gonna End It Doesn't Look Good For Us, My Friend Chaos has been unleashed People are dying in the streets When's it gonna end It doesn't look good for us, my friend Thoughts and prayers And heartbreak is near For people we love People we hold dear Friend or foe, these days It’s hard to know When’s it gonna end? It doesn’t look good for us, my friend Hate, hate, it’s everywhere Where can we be safe Where can we find peace When can we get there We can’t get along We can’t listen or hear We can't agree and don’t even try We can’t be kind? Why? Why? Sadness, sadness every day More bad news, more people die Or they live and they suffer And we don’t even try When’s it gonna end It doesn’t look good for us, my friend It gets closer and closer, every day We think, we’ll just go, we’ll move away Where, where are you gonna go Where you will be safe With no violence, no hate No corner of this earth has peace When’s it gonna end? It doesn’t look good for us, my friend...

Things don't suck...and other lies I tell myself

Image
Things do not suck.  Okay, let's be honest, maybe they suck a little.  I'm an eternal optimist, one of those people who irritate those  who never want to look at the bright side,  who are happy to point out what's bad  about the world and don't think they  have anything to be grateful for. I pride myself on being grateful and on being optimistic. But truly, lately things, well, they kind of suck. First, I'm a mom.  Greatest honor of my life.   My daughter is awesome.  Sarcastic, sharp tongued, witty, intelligent,  strong-willed, ambitions, driven, argumentative and isn't easily swayed.   She's the best thing that ever happened to me.   So what could go wrong, you ask?  Okay, well, she had the audacity,  after 18 years of care, worry and sacrifice,  to go off to college....four hours away.   Who does that?  Well, my awesome, driven daughter of ...

Suffering and other things that suck

Image
Suffering .... sucks.  Big time.   Suffering really sucks when it's someone  you love doing the suffering. I figured out a long time ago that one of the worst things we  can ever go through  is watching someone we love ...suffer.    I disappeared a little...from this blog,  from my friends, from life a little bit.   It's what I almost always do  when life gets a little overwhelming.   And overwhelming is a bit of an understatement for lately. We are a bit of a mess.  It was so hot and we moved all her stuff in. My daughter went away to college.   That's awesome.   Dropping her off and driving away,  not so awesome.  My heart hurt really badly.   I got a whole evening in of feeling sorry  for myself... .sobbing and feeling sorry for myself.   But it didn't last. In the mornin...

Parenting is not for the faint of heart...and other painful ah-ha moments

Image
Parenting is not for the faint of heart.  Like at all.  I say this a lot.  And if you're out there agreeing with me, welcome to the tribe.  If you are out there thinking, hey, I don't get what she's saying. Parenting is super simple and easy, then....well, I don't know.  I guess I want to meet you. The hardest part about parenting, in my humble opinion, is when you are rolling along, like on cruise control and you think everything is going okay.  I should have learned by now that this is the time to worry, that it is the calm before the storm, that I am racing head first into a brick wall, about to crash into certain doom. Every once in awhile, I think I'm doing a good job.  Then, I find out, no, in fact, I am not doing a good job.  There seems to be ample folks out there just waiting to share this news, at any moment, on a day when I'm not on my game that, in fact, I suck the big one when it comes to parenting.  You know what I mean here...

Wait for a man who....and other unfathomable twists of fate

Image
Wait for a man who calls you beautiful no matter what you look like Wait for a man who looks deeply into your eyes as though he's trying to remember every little detail Wait for a man for a man who kisses your forehead, the top of your head and pulls your hand close to his heart Wait for a man who makes you feel safe, warm, comfortable, treasured Wait for a man who holds you close, so close you forget everything you were worrying about before his arms were wrapped around you and he was holding you tightly against his chest who strokes your hair and face so slowly like he has nowhere else to be....forever whose eyes close gently when he's close to you because the feelings overwhelm Wait for a man who makes you smile and laugh until your smile muscles are sore and you wonder why you never smiled like this before who says he's thinking of you even five minutes after you were together who asks if you are home okay after you left him ...